If you’re interested in exploring a “sober curious” lifestyle, creating a plan and a support network are helpful first steps.
A growing number of “sober curious” people are starting to take a closer look at the role alcohol plays in their lives. Sober curious simply means that you’ve chosen to avoid alcohol for personal or wellness reasons. It involves curiosity about the reasons fueling your desire to drink and the way alcohol affects your life.
Sober curiosity is nothing new. Month-long sobriety challenges like Sober October and Dry January have encouraged people to reevaluate their alcohol use. Some also try to break habits like drinking without thinking or drinking socially just because everyone else does.
Unlike people who stay sober because of dependency or addiction, “sober curious” people may not necessarily meet the criteria for an alcohol use disorder or intend to give up alcohol permanently.
Keep reading to learn how to start living a “sober curious” lifestyle.
Sober curiosity often begins with some concern about how alcohol is affecting your life. It usually involves some questioning about the drinking culture and your pattern of alcohol use.
You can have concerns about your drinking habits even if you don’t meet the criteria for alcohol use disorder.
You may not feel a need to quit entirely, but taking a break might help you find more productive ways of managing challenges. That’s what being “sober curious” means, in a nutshell.
How it started
Credit for the term “sober curious” goes to Ruby Warrington, author of the 2018 book “Sober Curious: The Blissful Sleep, Greater Focus, Limitless Presence, and Deep Connection Awaiting Us All on the Other Side of Alcohol.”
It isn’t necessarily a permanent change
Going sober curious allows you the opportunity to see how sobriety or moderation might fit into your life.
Some people choose to avoid alcohol for 2 weeks, 1 month, or 1 year. Others don’t set any time limit but commit to going without “for now” or “indefinitely.”
As you consider what you do and don’t enjoy about alcohol, you might choose to have a drink on occasion. This is one key difference between the “sober curious” movement and total sobriety.
Many “sober curious” people who notice troubling patterns in their alcohol use find that a few weeks or months of sobriety helps them practice more moderate and mindful drinking going forward. And all those health benefits that come with sobriety? Just think of them as an added bonus.
The Surgeon General released a statement in January 2025 warning of the risks of drinking, even in moderation. There’s evidence to link alcohol use to an increased risk of developing several types of cancer.
Other ways drinking may affect your health include:
- hangovers
- difficulty sleeping
- problem concentrating
- frequent illness
- feelings of anxiety or depression
Alcohol has
- increase your risk of liver disease and cancer
- increase risk of alcohol use disorder
- contribute to changes in mood and behavior that lead to conflict in your relationships
According to a 2018 study, 1 month of abstaining from alcohol may help lower blood pressure and risk for alcohol-related diseases.
People participating in month-long sobriety challenges also reported increased energy and productivity, better sleep, and weight loss.
If you’re ready to try a sober lifestyle, here are some first steps you can take to get started.
Shift your mindset
If you’re weighing the benefits of short-term sobriety, focus on what you’ll gain, not what you’ll lose.
Instead of thinking, “I won’t be able to drink with my friends,” remind yourself that cutting out alcohol may energize you, leaving you open to socializing in more rewarding ways.
How you structure your “sober curious” journey matters less than what you get out of it. The key lies in exploring your relationship with alcohol.
Create a plan
Stepping back from regular drinking might also involve making different choices about how you spend your time. If getting drinks with friends or dates has traditionally occupied a lot of your time, you’ll need to determine how to navigate these situations.
Plenty of options for alcohol-free socializing and dating exist. Many bars and restaurants are also expanding their non-alcohol or ‘mocktail’ offerings to include inventive drinks.
If you’re opening up your social circle to a few close friends, consider a hike or picnic in the park.
When you know you’ll be in a social setting that involves alcohol, preparing your response ahead of time helps you stick to your decision in a situation where you might feel swayed.
A simple “No, thanks,” is perfectly fine — there’s no need to explain further (unless you want to, of course).
Need ideas? Here are some alcohol-free activities our editors enjoy.
Breakfast dates. “I go to the diner almost every week with my best friend where we catch up over omelets, pancakes, and coffee.” — Morgan, newsletter editor
TV show or movie night. “It makes getting together more intentional.” — Sarah, engagement editor
Playing board games. “Nothing like some casual competition amongst friends to make you forget all about alcohol.” — Ginger, newsletter editor
Museum outings. “Whether you love what you see or decide it’s not for you, a trip to a museum opens a lot of opportunity for conversation.” — Megan, senior editorial director
Find a crowd
Once you choose to go alcohol-free, connecting with like-minded people can help you feel less alone.
Plenty of people drink to make socializing easier, and it’s not always easy to turn down a drink in a crowd of others who are drinking. Yet, as more people begin to explore sober curiosity, not drinking becomes more normalized, and that’s not at all a bad thing.
Change up your hobbies
Many people who quit drinking find themselves with more free time than usual. Dedicating this time to self-care and satisfying hobbies can help you stay motivated to maintain a “sober curious” lifestyle.
Some possibilities to consider:
- explore neighborhood parks
- try meditation or a new fitness class
- spend some quality time with that stack of books on your nightstand
- get back into an old hobby
Consider moderation
You don’t have to go all in at once, or ever. You may have heard of “Damp January,” which is where people reduce their alcohol intake instead of giving it up completely. You can still
Reducing your alcohol intake can also provide space for you to explore your relationship with alcohol.
Some have criticized the “sober curious” movement as a “trend” that overlooks the often difficult, complex process of recovery, and it’s a valid argument.
Giving up alcohol typically isn’t easy for people with alcohol use disorder. Maintaining sobriety involves a lot of hard work, and it’s a lifelong process for many.
There’s nothing wrong with choosing a “sober curious” lifestyle to improve wellness. But it’s also important to recognize the difference between sobriety and the choice to go without drinking. Plenty of people can’t pick up sobriety and safely set it aside later, no matter how tough it gets.
It’s also important to remember that alcohol use occurs on a spectrum. People tend to think in pretty binary terms when it comes to alcohol use disorder: Somebody either has a drinking problem and needs to give up alcohol for life, or they don’t.
In reality, though, people recovering from alcohol use disorder can go on to drink occasionally. Similarly, people who don’t meet the criteria for alcohol use disorder can still have a challenging relationship with alcohol and benefit from taking a break.
Sober curiosity is all about exploring what works best for you.
Short term or not, sober curiosity can still promote mindful drinking habits and lasting lifestyle changes. The “sober curious” movement doesn’t work for everyone, though. It’s absolutely OK to need extra support while addressing drinking habits.
If you find it difficult to avoid alcohol despite your best efforts, a good next step might involve reaching out to a professional who specializes in recognizing and treating alcohol dependence. You can also try out 12-step programs like Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) or SMART Recovery.
Crystal Raypole has previously worked as a writer and editor for GoodTherapy. Her fields of interest include Asian languages and literature, Japanese translation, cooking, natural sciences, sex positivity, and mental health. In particular, she’s committed to helping decrease stigma around mental health issues.
