Caregiving for someone with advanced breast cancer can be a challenge for you and the person you care for. Try to find a balance between caring for yourself and your care recipient.

Becoming the caregiver of someone with advanced breast cancer is a significant undertaking. You have an important role to play in their treatment and overall well-being.

We created this guide to help you avoid feeling overwhelmed.

If you’re the main caregiver, then you’re in this together. Honest, open communication is the only way to go.

Here are a few tips for getting your partnership off on the right foot:

  • Ask rather than assume what’s needed. It’ll make things easier for both of you.
  • Offer to help with certain practical matters, such as medical paperwork, but let them do things for themselves when they want to. Don’t make them more dependent than they need to be.
  • Respect their choices about treatment, care, and who they want to see.
  • Share feelings. Allow them to talk about their emotions without feeling judged. It’s important to share your feelings, too. Don’t let your role overtake your relationship.

When caring for someone with advanced breast cancer, it can be helpful to familiarize yourself with the disease. As it progresses, you’ll have some idea what to expect so you’re not caught off guard.

Some changes you might see in someone with advanced cancer are:

  • lack of appetite
  • weight loss
  • extreme fatigue
  • difficulty concentrating
  • progressive pain and discomfort

Changes in mood aren’t uncommon. Good moods might alternate with sadness, anger, fear, frustration, and worry.

These are all typical reactions to the situation. But there may be times when you’re not sure what to do, and that’s OK.

You’re a caregiver, but you’re also human. You’re not expected to be perfect. Trust your instincts and reach out for help when you need it.

You may be the main caregiver, but you don’t have to be the only caregiver. Tell family and friends that you need help. Some people will offer to help, but a general request doesn’t always get through.

Spell out exactly what you need and when you need it. Be direct.

Caregiving tools can help you do that with minimal fuss.

Several organizations provide online caregiving calendars that let others claim duties on specific days and times so you can plan on doing something else.

Sites also allow you to create a web page to save time and keep everyone updated individually. Then, you can post status updates and photos. You decide who has access to the page. Guests can leave comments and sign up to lend a helping hand.

Check out:

As the disease progresses, think about home healthcare and hospice options, so you’re not overwhelmed with responsibility.

Caregiving is a rewarding act, but it’s one you probably didn’t plan on. It starts with providing a little help but can become a full-time job before you know it.

When someone you love has advanced cancer, it takes an emotional toll on you, too.

While you’re tending to their physical and emotional needs, you also have your own feelings to care for. You may sometimes wonder if you’re up to the challenge.

The fact is that nobody can keep it up all day, every day, without feeling the stress.

When’s the last time you had some “me time”? If you answer that you don’t remember or that it isn’t important, maybe you should reconsider.

If you don’t find an outlet for your stress, it’s hard to be the best caregiver you can be. It’s not selfish, and there’s no reason to feel guilty. It’s about the bigger picture.

Ask yourself what you need. It can be a short break for a walk every day, one evening out, or a whole day all to yourself.

What matters is that you choose this block of time and make it happen. Mark it on your calendar and consider it part of your to-do list. Then, find someone to cover for you while you rejuvenate.

After your break, you’ll have something new to share with your care recipient.

If you’re under prolonged stress, you could end up with some health complications. Some symptoms of stress include:

  • headache
  • fatigue or sleep difficulties
  • stomach upset
  • fading sex drive
  • trouble focusing
  • irritability or sadness
  • under- or overeating
  • social withdrawal
  • lack of motivation
  • smoking or drinking more

If you have some of these symptoms, it might be time to think about stress management. Consider:

If physical symptoms of stress continue, speak with your doctor.

Sometimes, it helps to talk with someone in a similar situation. Other primary caregivers will understand you in a way no one else can. They can offer a few helpful hints on how to make life easier.

Support groups are a great place to get support, and you’ll soon realize you can also give some.

Your local hospital may be able to refer you to an in-person caregiver support group. If not, you may be able to connect with others through these organizations:

  • CancerCare provides free, professional support services for caregivers and loved ones, including counseling and support groups.
  • Caregiver Action Network provides free education, peer support, and resources to family caregivers nationwide.

Are your caregiving duties forcing you to take time off work? Find out if you’re eligible for unpaid leave under the Family and Medical Leave Act.

Caregiving can be a rewarding experience, but it can also take a toll on your health.

Remember to respect your care recipient’s boundaries, and try learning more about advanced breast cancer. Some apps and websites can save you some time while caregiving.

It’s OK to ask for additional help and take breaks when you need it. You can also try support groups for caregivers.